This guide may be printed (A5) and enclosed with a gift. Your rock will not read along.

Care guide

Congratulations on your new rock. You have chosen a pet that is low-maintenance in every respect. Please read this guide carefully nonetheless.

Settling in

Your rock needs no time to settle in. It has already settled. It is settled everywhere.

You may feed your rock. It will achieve nothing. Your rock will not hold it against you.

Your rock is happy to accompany you. It will not cover a single metre. This is normal.

Your rock masters “sit”, “stay” and “down” immediately. “Come” and “shake hands” require patience. A great deal of patience. More than you have.

Your rock listens to you. Whether it understands is a question science has yet to answer. Do not respond to every silence – it does not either.

Should you wish to part with your rock, you may trade it. It will not hold it against you. It will not even remember. Probably.

Longer than yours.

NixStein · What can your rock do? Nothing.